TLP Hitting the wall

So the first 4 weeks of listening to The Listening Program went by fast and were quite enjoyable. I noticed an improvement in sleeping. I still don't sleep through the night, but when I fall asleep, I sleep in a deeper state. I also noticed I am calmer and that is a huge bonus.
The problem is sometime in week 5 or 6 I came unglued at the seams. My provider warned me he thought I would have things rise up to the surface and asked me if I had someone I could talk to when they did. I assured him I did, as I had a great friend in mind. However, she hit a rough patch in life herself and I didn't want to add to her current burdens and knew I couldn't chat with her. So what then?
I went to a counselor. Then I went to another counselor and I like her alot. She is a no nonsense type which is perfect for an intelligent woman of my age. First visit I broke down and cried, as I have been doing for 3weeks now. Tears are always just under the surface and errupting at the least little thing. Can not believe the big and little memories bubbling up.
There is a big hole in my memory. I'm missing people's names and my connections to them from when I lived in Vernal UT years ago. Now they are flooding back along with stuff I forgot for good reasons! Like getting punched by my husband in my sleep. Nice one to deal with. Like myriads of ridiculous living situations I allowed myself and my children to live in. So as these things come up I'm also looking at my current life conditions and finding many of them unexceptable too. This has thrown me into a huge life evaluation mode and perhaps it was about time. I have not stopped listening though. I will do this for myself, as after all the things I have been through in my life, I deserve to have some peace and enjoy consistent happiness. Doesn't everyone?!

Difficulties with School

The goal is to complete something I've wanted since high school... a college degree. I'm bright. I have a high IQ. I even have a nice EQi. I'm personable and can write well. In fact in my entire life I have never gotten anything but an 'A' on any paper I have ever written. That's all through school, including over 4 years of college. However, now I'm at Westminster College, where I will get an incredible education IF I can do it!

So why all the angst? When I am qualified, experienced and skilled?

Cuz things don't connect right in my brain. I've had one too many head injuries and way too much stress in my long, long life and it has caught up with me.

Now let me interject right here, that this is NOT due to experimentation with contraband substances, ie: drugs, or overconsumption of alcohol. Although a glass of wine does sound good right now. Many of my generation and other people too, have burned themselves out with either or both of those hobbies. Doing drugs and/or drinking too much is not my excuse for faulty faculties. Just been knocked silly a bunch.

So here is the deal. I started the term January 10th. Pretty excited. Randy told everyone he was dating a college girl which had to upset a few people looking at his silver curly hair! I went to class, took notes, thought I could whip papers out left and right like I always have been able to do. Not this time.

I can't get the campus email to work. I can't find the submissions protocols even though we had a class on it. I can't go back and forth between the web pages without getting lost. I really do not understand what this paper is supposed to look like. I started a grandious version and here is the intro:

"Whether awareness is a factor or not, humans make daily choices, based on their individual codes of ethics. One person may differ from another, and even all others, in their particular code of ethics, but all justify their actions and words by their codes. From Adolf Hitler to Mahatma Ghandi, a personal code gave birth to various courses of action. The outcomes were and are quite different, but all affect some change or lack of change for those in their circles of influence. The difficulty as a society is coming up with a code of ethics all citizens of the group will agree to and within which scope they can abide. A good place to start could be agreement on a definition of ethics and then on its application to said group."

Parts are good, but mostly it just punches you in the face! Simplifying is not what I'm doing here! And then my submissions would not attach to the emails to my professor/coach, Michael Sutton, PhD. He has to think I'm nuts cuz he said no one is interpreting the assignments like I am and suggested a phone consult!

(Now this is where I veer off on the 'Wow Westminster College and the BBA program has outstanding customer service!' track!)

Michael called me this evening and stayed on the phone until we both felt I could complete this current paper on Ethics. I wanted to put a cool poster in it! Even got the author's permission to use it! Michael said to simplify. And I don't need to write for the Universe, just the reader, him. He explained how the paper should look and be laid out. And then, if that wasn't enough, he said we could do this again, chat for 5-10 minutes about the next assignment. So I could get caught up.

This is still excellent customer service. And it is also what it takes to succeed when dealing with head injuries. I do believe it is time for my TLP listening session... Ciao and special thanks to Dr. Michael!